Sophie's story

 

Hi, my name’s Sophie and although I’m only 13 I have a bit of a tale to tell! Some people think that being put in care is the best thing to do but in my case I don't think it was such a good idea.

Siblings in park
 

When I was 5 they moved my brother to 
a children’s home. I really missed him. I couldn't do it on my own as I was young and scared and I felt lonely.

 

 

No where else to go

I was only little when I went into care, it was really hard but my brother was by my side every step of the way. My mum had me when she was about 20 and my brother when she was 17. A lot had happened to her before she had me which is why (I’m guessing) she got mental health problems. She's not really told me a great deal of what had happened to her because she wanted to tell me when I was older and stronger to cope with some of the things better.

I know my mum never intended on putting us in care, but she couldn't do much else I mean she was always in and out of hospital for self harm and I guess that just weren't good for mine and my brothers eyes. One time she was in hospital for 7 months, so we stayed with nana. After that we returned home to our mum but a few months later it all happened again. So we stayed with nana again, but then nana got too ill to take care of us.

So then social services got involved, (this is one of the reasons I hate them!). There was a few court hearings so until the judge had a final decision we stayed between nana and our uncle. Finally the judge made a decision, the wrong decision in my eyes but thinking about it there was no where else for us to go.

 

Saying goodbye to my brother

We got took into care when I was 3 and my brother was 6. I remember the social worker holding my hand and pulling me away from my mum, I was crying and screaming. I didn't want to go I mean who would? But I got pulled into the car and cuddled up to my big brother, I cried most of the way to our foster carers house.

I don't really remember much at this age, I just remember being moved round 10 different foster houses until we finally lived in one for about a year and half. My brother didn't get on with our foster dad (well I didn't either really) but I liked my foster mum. So when I was 5 they moved him to a children’s home. He spent three years there and I really missed him. I couldn't do it on my own as I was young and scared and I felt lonely.

Moving around…again and again

When I was 6 I got moved to a big foster family. They had a few other foster kids and some of their own kids. I stayed with them for three years but then my anger and problems started getting worse and I was getting excluded from school everyday. I stopped getting on with my foster carers, and eventually got moved into a children’s home.

I begged them not to put me in the children’s home as soon as I saw the look of the place. I wanted to go back. I was litterally on my knees sobbing please I'll be good I swear to my foster carers. But they weren't having any of it and it felt like they had just kicked me out. I have been through so much, and looking back at all this now it just kills me. I haven't had the best life, even though I know some people are worse off you don't really realise when you've got too much going on in your own life and you're heads messed up.

Anyway I spent two years there. I hated it and picked up really bad habits. I ran away for 3 weeks and smoked a bit of weed and started drinking so finally (after 2 years!) my social worker got the message and moved me away from there. But my new home wasn’t much better. I was bullied by the girls and yet again begged to be placed somewhere else. I've had nose bleeds and black eyes because I couldn't defend myself from 3 of them all having a go at punching me.

 

Getting into bad habits

So in 2008 I got moved to live with a foster carer. She was a nice lady but I just didn't realise that at the time. I was a spoilt drunken little brat, and all I did was give her gip which I feel really guilty about now. I was getting into sex, and spliffs and all that. I was hardly seeing my mum, and no one was there to listen to me. I felt alone and like no one cared about me.

So I turned to gangs, who else was there? No one wanted me around apart from that gang. I had fights at school, fights on the streets, hangovers you name it.

I was going through depression and anger problems. It was like a whole new me, and it actually felt like I was my mum back in the day when she had all them problems.

Finding the help I needed

After nearly a year I got moved to a therapeutic residental place. At first I had doubts about it but they have helped me so much. I know I’ve done a lot of bad things but care isn't the right solution for me anymore. I am ready now to move back in with my mum, and she is ready to have me home. It’s my only dream, if I could have anything for Christmas it would be that.
 
The home are even helping me with all the problems I have. I've ended up in hospital 3 times for self harm and have done runners from the house but I am fine now. I have got so much better thanks to them.

I hope when you read this that you don't do the same bad stuff I did. Taking drugs and getting drunk messes you up. I'm in year 9 now and already working to doing an English GCSE early. I am a really clever girl says my carers, and i'm not letting all the problems all the bad stuff I've done get in the way.

I'm hoping one day to be a writer, to go to college and university. I've even been in trouble with the police (luckily I didn’t end up with a criminal record), but that's all about to change now. People in care who think you can't do it, you can't change or succeed... well you can! I have done it, I've changed so just keep working at it! Getting the support that I needed has helped me to put stuff behind me and be the better person I can be. 

Thanks for reading my story!

 

Comments

  1. emma sawyer says:

    Well Done sophie for fighting against all the odds and working hard to start your GSCE's a year early

  2. kaz says:

    Hi Sophie, I work with teenage boys in a residential care home, so I'm really interested in hearing/reading about children in care and their stories. Respect to you for succeeding and overcoming your bad start in life. None of us can change the past, but we can shape our future. I wish you a happy and successful life. xx

  3. Sam says:

    Dear Sophie, I want to thank you for being brave enough to share your story. I am a support worker and presently doing some research regarding the experiences children in care have, i am so sorry to hear yours was so negative. You are a real inspiration to other young people, you show that it is possible to turn life around no matter where you have come from. Thank you again for sharing your story, no doubt it will inspire all who read it.rnrnGood luck for the future, i wish you all the best x

  4. DAVID WILSON says:

    Dear sophie,i totally understand what you are, and have gone through,i was in care from the age of two to the age of 16(im 35 now).rndont let anyone tell you that you dont have a future because of your past,i live with my wife and two kids now,and life is fantastic with my two boys who are doing ace at school,im looking to start a career in helping kids like yourself that are in care.rnSophie i really honestly wish you the very best,dont look at the past always look to the future,the only thing the past will do is make you strong for the future,you go for it with your gcse's and get yourself a fab job and have a fab life.there is always a light at the end of the tunnel,grab it with both hands and go for it.

  5. diana says:

    dear sophie, you are so brave to send in that story i know i haved learn from your mistakes but you have also got to remeber that everyone makes mistakes so dont be to harsh on yourself and look to the future now. And also a very big well done on taking your english gcse a year early i think you will pass it and good luck. I also think think that some day you will be a writer and i for one will read it. xx

  6. Jessie•Ann Robinson says:

    Hello there Sophie. I'm Jessie•Ann and when I'm older (11 now) I am hoping to be a care home assistant and stop kids having anger problems and help them. I'm really sorry about what happened to you and I wish it never did happen and hope that you have a really nice fute out there to look forward to!! Xxrn Thanks for reading xxrn Jessie•Ann

  7. Dilly says:

    what a brave girl! good luck and wish you all the best Sophie.. Dilly.

  8. Kayziiee says:

    I know all about this but thanks for sharing your story rnTough times but well done for gettign through rnxx

  9. becky says:

    Hi, Sophie rni am really happy for you,i am becky i am 14 and and you are brave to share your story, i dont think i would be so brave and forget the past think about the future. and in the future you will succeed in life your very tallented taking you GCSE a year early GOOD LUCK.so remember what i said look to the future not back to the past xx b

  10. Daniella says:

    Sophie, this brought a tear to my eye, i'm in care my self and sometimes struggle, but for you to come out the other end , be brave enough to share your story and to be doing so well inspires me. im so glad you had the courage to share your story. Good luck in the future and strive for the best and you'll become the talented writer you are and want to be. (i'll so read your books). you should be so proud of yourself, and you deserve all the best. good luck with your GCSE's, my tip for those, study hard. im so happy you managed to turn your life around and wish u all the best for the future. :) xxx

  11. emma says:

    Hi Sophie reading your story bought a tear to my eye. I grew up within the care sysytem and experienced similar things to you. I was however lucky to meet good carers in my late teens who helped me turn my life around. Keep your chin up and follow your dreams :) xxx
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