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Some of the main things you can expect in your day to day life in care are:
- The place where you live must be clean, warm and comfortable.
- You will usually have your own bedroom in foster care, and definitely in a children’s home (unless the children’s home is a school in which case there will be no more than four children in a room). You will only share a room with another child in foster care if you have said it’s ok. If you are not happy about where you sleep you can tell your carer and they have to change it if they can.
- Your carer will make sure you go to school and will be there to help you with homework, getting you books and uniform and all the other things you need for school. They will attend your parent/teacher conferences (meetings that happen once a term where your teachers say how they think you are doing and discuss anything that needs to change to make sure you can do well in your education). They and your social worker will do everything they can to make sure that being in care doesn’t mean you have to change school, and the government has introduced a law which says that you can’t move school when you’re in year 10 as that could affect your GCSEs.
- You should have a say in the food you eat, and be able to help shop for and help make your own meals. If there’s anything you cannot eat because of your religion or health, you won’t have to. Any special food you need will be given to you. If you’re in a children’s home, there will be set meal times when people eat together.
- You will be given some pocket money to spend on whatever you want.
- Your carers will be given money for your clothes and the other things you need, which you should be allowed to choose. They are also given some money to buy you presents for your birthday and other special occasions, depending on your culture.
- Your carers will help you with your hobbies and interests. They should help you plan and celebrate birthdays, name days and other festivals. You should be allowed to have your friends round for tea, and to go to their homes. Your carer will decide if you can stay overnight at friends’ houses (just like a parent would).
- You are allowed to bring your own toys and personal things into your new home, which is important because having your own familiar stuff around can help to make a new place feel more like home.
- If you are at school your carer will buy all the things you need, like books, pens and pencils. Your carer will make sure you have a school uniform.
- Your carer will pay for you to do activities like dance classes and football. If you were doing these before, they will help you to keep them up.
- Your carer must make sure that you go to a dentist, doctor or nurse when you need to. If you have any questions or worries about your health – and this includes problems with your mental health, like feeling depressed or harming yourself, or feeling like you need to take drugs or drink alcohol to be happy or to forget about bad stuff – then you must talk to your carer so that they can help you (there’s more information about staying healthy in the Who Cares? Health and Wellbeing Centre).
- Your carer can sign forms for you to go on outings with the school, if it is for a day. They cannot sign forms for medical things - these must be signed by a social worker. If you live more than three miles from the school, you are entitled to a bus pass.
- Your carer should listen to your feelings and what you want, and try to help.
- You must be given a say in the decisions that affect you, and you should be told about any decisions and changes to your care, and the reasons for them.
- You should be given at least one person, outside of the foster or children’s home and the local authority, who you can speak to about problems or worries (see Who's who in the care system for more information about people that can help you).
- You should be able to talk on the phone to members of your family in private (see Staying in touch with friends and family for more information). Visits can also be arranged with family members at times that your carer agrees to.
- Your carers must never smack, slap or shake you, or harm you in any way.
- You should never be bullied by an adult or another young person while you are in a foster home or a children’s home, and if you are you need to tell an adult in charge as soon as possible so they can help you.
- Your carers are only allowed to hold you down if it seems like you or someone else might get hurt, or something might get broken.
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Remember, overall your carers are there to help you have the best possible life you can, and the same chances as other children. They want you to be happy and feel loved and valued, and should listen to your wishes and feelings.
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