Party hard

Dear Suzie,

I've got a really big problem that is totally embarrassing. I slept with this girl at a party. it was the first time for me and I think for her too. Now I am really embarrassed because people at school found out and they are laughing at me because this girl isn't very pretty. I wish I had never done it but everyone knows now. Also, I feel quite bad for the girl because she is getting lots of nasty comments.

Anonymous, 14, Newcastle

Suzie's answer

You've shown one admirable quality - you feel bad for her. If you'd slept with her because you liked her (regardless of whether other people think she's pretty or not), that would be two.

Now, you can be a follower or a leader. You can join the crowd saying "she's not pretty" and view this as your problem - you slept with the 'wrong' girl. Or you can see it as a joint problem between you and her - that you both went too far, too early, and have some regrets.

You can make a decent thing out of a bad situation by being kind and caring, tell the crowd to stop being such idiots and support her. Whether she's 'pretty' or not is beside the point. If this was a script for a film, what do you think the real hero would do? And remember, legally you shouldn't have sex under the age of 16 but, if you choose to, you should always use contraception.